Craig Ferguson is pregnant! Well, his wife is

From Twitter!

CraigyFerg

Holy crackers! Mrs F is pregnant. How did that happen? …oh yeah I know how. Another Ferguson arrives in 2011. The world trembles.

CONGRATS Mr. and Mrs. Ferguson!

Kate Plus 8: Lawmaker questions kids’ work permits

Hot on the heels of the ratings news that “Kate Plus Eight” lost more than one million viewers between its first episode in June and its second that aired Sunday, comes another challenge to the TLC show. The Pennsylvania work permits allowing the six-year-old children of Kate Gosselin to be part of the reality TV show are being questioned by a legislator who has asked the state’s attorney general to step in CLICK Z’s STORY

Real Housewives of NJ Season 2- ep. 6 Spoilers and Recap

Teresa is pretty sure Gia is going to be a star. She takes her in for some acting coaching and while in the waiting room we are treated to some fun. I don’t think Teresa understands what a stage mother is and honestly, I don’t think SHE is one. Stage moms are usually very driven and put their own needs/wants/intentions first. I don’t see Teresa like that. She sees her child as one of the most beautiful and talented beings to ever grace the planet and she is proud to show her off. I can’t even fault her for that. It’s really sweet.

While waiting with the other parents she makes conversation….or she tries to. She casually says that Gia is trying out for a Christian Slater movie and asks if anyone else is going for that. The woman next to her takes an appropriate stage mom stance; eyes buldge, nostrils flare, leans slightly toward Teresa before she says “Yeah, we are.” with the slightlest bit of a threat laced in there…somewhere. Teresa senses the danger but she is confused by it. Usually when a woman acts like this it is because they are protecting their man. Teresa is out of her comfort zone so she dismisses it and begins to talk to the room in general and to no one really. She tells everyone that Gia doesn’t need prepping and she memorized her lines quickly. It was really bragging because Teresa just thought this was information that other parents of aspiring stars might relate to. She goes on to share her child’s interests and mesmerizes the room with amazing details. She then says she is not a stage mom, which I happen to agree with. I don’t think she is. I really believe that if Gia said ‘I don’t want to do this fashion show’ then she wouldn’t do it. Teresa worst mothering trait is to allow her children to dictate far too much.

We see a bit of Gia’s lesson. She is a cute kid and in the right role I think she would be great.

Chris was given a promotion at the Brownstone. Anyone can see that this family has worked hard to make this business a success. They might have a lot of money but they earned it. I like that the family works together and shares in the fruit of their labor. The kids are being trained to work and will likely have a role in the business someday. What’s not to like about that?

Danielle’s scene last week not only served to show her as a complete ASS and that NO ONE is out to get her. Nothing happened to her at the Brownstone! NOTHING.

Jacqueline went to the Salon and of course Kim G (nice lady) appeared at the same time. I am sure Bravo had nothing to do with the timing. It was just a coincidence. Right? Kim wants to talk about Danielle and says she is SO DRAINED- then the baby interrupted. Jacqueline doesn’t want to talk about it but Kim G insisted. Finally J opens up and says a few things that are all pretty accurate. Kim G is far too sane to hang in Danielle and not see how NUTS she is. For some reason she ends the conversation saying that she still wants to give her a chance. WHY? Is she in a Bravo contract? How much is dignity worth these days?

Kim G throws a birthday party for Danielle. They have professional make up artists getting them dolled up. Kim begins to criticize Danny for calling Chris a “faggot” and says that Danielle could have made a better choice for an escort. Danielle informs us that she is a GAY ADVOCATE. Stop right there. What the heck is a gay advocate? An advocate that happens to be gay? Is Danielle gay? No, I don’t think so….so??? Danielle then explains that it’s ok to call someone a FAGGOT if they are not really gay? **checking my name calling handbook** Nope, nothing in there about that loop hole. She then tells us in her personal interview that she was offended when he used the term but she was being “protected at that moment and was in the LIONS DEN.” Protected from WHAT? From not having a choice table to sit at during a charity event? Did Danny protect her from DONATING at the event because she sure didn’t do that. Did Danny protect her from making an ass out of herself? No, he didn’t.

Kim calmly says that Chris is her son’s best friend and she expresses her disapproval for Danny’s actions. Pause…then Danielle comes up with a whole new angle: Shame on his mother and father for not being out there, knowing that I was arriving and he has to deal with that on his own. Shame on them.”….Wow…Does she hear herself? They knew SHE was coming and should have done…what? They let their son do his job and they are wrong for that? THEY should have been there to greet her? Can you imagine her response if the Manzo’s HAD been there? She proceeds to rant about the Manzo’s and warns Kim to watch her “legancies”….Kim changes the subject and says they need to get to the party.

At the party Kim G’s mother-in-law hugs Danielle and then takes her outside to talk. Kim G and the MIL try to talk to her. This is the first time I am realizing that Kim G is wearing a fur vest. Wasn’t Danielle wearing that last week? Maybe they each have one or maybe Danielle is borrowing Kim’s clothes? Ok…sorry…back to important things. The ladies are tryign to talk some sense into Danielle who feels the timing was wrong and they should not have brought it up at HER birthday party…the one that THEY paid for. On another side note: who are these guests? Kim G wants Danielle to GET OVER IT. We all do. Danielle says she IS over it but she doesn’t want anyone that loves HER to defend THEM. Danielle says tearfully that the “they” will be happy to hear that at her birthday party they were bringing this up. Both nice ladies tell her that she shouldn’t care and that she cares too much about them. I DO NOT CARE ABOUT THEM, Danielle insists…just because she stalks them and talks about them endlessly does not mean that she cares about them. Not at all.

Inside we see a toast ..or something…being given by Danielle at her own party. Kim G is holding a GIANT glass of wine. Ahhh…..that explains all this. Kim G is drunk and doesn’t realize this is not a dream. Wait till she sobors up and finds out that she befriended a crazy woman while on a bender….

Dina is planning an event for Project Lady Bug and I admire her work for that. She has to talk about Danielle. AGAIN. This whole season has been a on track record for her. Is there nothing else on her mind?

The acting school/agent wants Gia to lose her Jersey accent. This confuses both mother and child. I wish Teresa would take her child and run. Leave her accent ALONE.

Danielle is ranting in her kitchen. ALONE. To her credit she is aware that she is talking to herself. Kim G comes to visit….why? It was in the script. Danielle says that Ashley has been setting up hate pages about her on Facebook and that it’s ‘highly terroristic”…most 50 yr old women would be upset if an 18 year set up a Facebook page against them. Right? She is says “it’s nothing short of the KKK” to her. REALLY? She says she feels threatened by Ashley’s behavior and actions and underlying messages….which we all know Danielle is capable of reading since she is so level headed. Kim G tells her to go to the police and deal with it. In truth I think Kim G just wanted her to talk to anyone other than HER…the police, the FBI, the guy at the deli counter, the greeter at Walmart….anyone other than her. I joined that Facebook page during the episode and read through it. Ashley did not set it up.

Jacquie and Teresa meet at a nice restaurant where T shares that Danielle and her daughter are getting into a Facebook war and text messages have been exchanged. Ashley is called to come join them. Danielle is spreading a rumor that Ashley threatened her life and she is calling the police to get a restraining order. Ashley explains what she said to her in the text and it is possible that a crazy woman could twist it to mean she was threatened. Texting “When you die you will go to Hell” could mean “I am going to kill you”….if you are insane you might read it that way.

Danielle takes Danny to a store to try on clothes. It appears she nor he are BUYING anything and I feel bad that the store has to waste their time dressing up a felon. Danielle has that fur vest on again. Dina calls her for a meeting. Danny and Danielle put their brilliant minds together and decide that this must be a meeting to apologize for ‘what happened the other night’…yeah, that makes sense. She wants Danny to be ‘available” to make her feel more at ease….because Dina might do….WHAT? She is paranoid and crazy beyond description.

Ashley posted on Facebook that Danielle put a warrant out for her arrest. Her mother and her boyfriend both tell her that it was a wrong and that baffles Ashley. I bet Ashley will be embarassed by all this in 10 years when she sees the tapes. Her boyfriend, who is older, assures her that she will go to jail if she does anything to Danielle. According to some reports online Ashley ended up pulling out some of Danielle’s extensions and the police were involved. I guess she decided not to listen. Kids these days.

Caroline has most of the family over for dinner. I love how she is with her family. They laugh, they have fun, they are nice to each other. Somethings can’t be faked and their interaction is one of them. Italian families rock.

Dina is going off to meet Danielle to tell her that she doesn’t want to see her again. I guess they are breaking up? No amount of Bravo writing will make this meeting valid. You don’t need to see someone that you never see to tell them that you don’t want to see them again. Read that again, I promise it makes sense.

Back at the family dinner Ashley brings up what happened with Danielle and the text messages. Caroline is listening intently. She is trying to find the way to address this but she is not sure how to proceed. She likes her motivations, to protect the family, but she doesn’t like the delivery.

They talk for a while about Danny calling Chris a faggot. Does everyone remember that Danny spent time in prision and he might have some…issues…with….never mind. The family is trying to decide if they are offended and I think they voted YES.

Meeting time with Dina and Danielle. Danny is waiting in the parking lot to “protect” Danielle. It’s amazing those two found each other. Neither one notices how whacked the other is. Perfect combo….and frightening at the same time. They should only be allowed to talk while supervised.

Chakra ‘s sign got a nice shot and plug. Wonder what kind of deal was worked out.

Dina starts to talk and she tells Danielle that she is done with her. In the ONLY moment of clarity we have ever seen Danielle tells us “You called me and ASKED me to come to tell me that you don’t want to be around me? Who does that?” Now I see what Bravo was doing. They picked up a book on how to interact with crazy people and created a scene that Danielle would finally GET. I am glad Dina played along. Danielle wants to bring the rest of the family into it. Dina does a good job at keeping the conversation on track for the most part….and then it starts to spiral down…..

and we are left with: TO BE CONTINUED

Real Housewives of NJ- Danielle’s big moment?

Teresa and Joe brought home their pile of pink fluff with a small person inside.   On the way Joe commented they needed a bigger Cadillac for their family and implied there would be a few more kids.  She asked him to get snipped because she is all done with having babies.  Joe is usually very sensitive so I was surprised when he said NO.  He told her to enjoy how active they were because it would slow down some day.  She told him she would find a younger man.  I think she was joking but I am not sure.  I don’t think Joe is too worried.  He knows he is prince charming and no other man could woo a woman with the skills he has.

For some reason Teresa thought it was a good idea to wake the sleeping 3 year old to see her baby sister’s outfit.   They have their priorities!  No one better miss a cute outfit.  Wake up kid!

Danielle is visiting with the lady lucky enough to be labeled her “friend” for this episode.  This is the same lady she called out at the luncheon asking her if she was Caroline’s friend.   I don’t know why this soul is agreeing to play along.  Her son is best friends with Caroline’s son, Chris.   The topic is the upcoming benefit to be held at the Brownstone for a baby that is sick with cancer.  For some strange reason, Danielle was invited to attend and she is working on gathering troops to go with her.

Danielle is wearing some strange fur vest thing and a diamond bracelet.  The bracelet is kind of  smallish looking…in my opinion.  The script demanded that the nice lady compliment Danielle on it so she could brag that it cost a lot of money.  It could easily be a CZ from Kmart but I am not going to question it.

The friend, Kim, tells us that she has a beautiful home but she doesn’t brag about it.   I guess bragging about it would be if she said she had she had a super-duper amazing beautiful home.  Got it. She agrees to attend the benefit at the Brownstone with Danielle because there will be nothing on Tv that night and…actually she doesn’t say WHY she is willing to do that and I can’t figure it out.  The nice lady promises to have Danielle’s back.  Maybe Danielle is going to give the nice lady her bracelet?  Maybe the nice lady is hoping to get a reputation? Maybe she wants to be a Bravo TV star?

Chris’s friend, John, comes to visit and hugs everyone. This is the nice lady’s son.  I smell…BRAVO SET UP.  Caroline tells us that you can’t be friends with all her kids parents.  Aint that the truth?  My kid’s friend had the most annoying mother I ever met.  I steer clear of her in Walmart to this day.  Back to matters at hand.  Caroline explains that John’s mother invited her to lunch and she turned it down because the nice lady is friends with Danielle.  She doesn’t want to mess up things with the boy’s friendship.  I guess I agree with her.  I think it’s good that she didn’t try to change the nice ladies’ opinion of Danielle before Bravo could get all the scenes shot.  I am working hard to pretend that I think this scene was needed for some reason and I didn’t just waste 6 minutes of my life.

Dina comes to see Teresa and the new baby.  I wonder why the normally perfectly dressed Teresa is wearing such an awful, tight outfit.  She just had a baby, where are her cute sweat pants?   They chat about Danielle.  Yawn.   Is she pyscho or a sociopath?  Who cares?

Albie, the up and coming Godfather, is meeting Ashley, his step-cousin, and her much older boyfriend for dinner.  He is ready to bust heads and takes names…or something like that.  Lauren is there to assist with the interrogation.  Ashley is living with her boyfriend but she assures us it’s ok because she is on birth control and everything.  I don’t want to know about the everything….kids these days.  Sheeesh.  I have to say that I love how much Albie is concerned and he is very sweet to involve himself.  I love Italian families.  They are in everybody’s business but that is just love.

Jacqueline comes to visit Derek’s mom.  (That’s Ashley’s boyfriend)  Ashley is living there with the boyfriend.  It seems that either J didn’t get the memo that vests were out of style or I didn’t get the memo that they were in.  I am leaning toward the latter.  They have a nice chat, some wine, and before we know it they are lounging on the couch together giggling.  They express love for each other…I need to know the name of the wine they are drinking.

At the Brownstone Chris and his Dad have to talk about Danielle coming to an event there.  I don’t quite get it.  She is weird and annoying but is she worthy of a grand alert?

Gia is celebrating her 9th birthday and Teresa wants it to be the event to remember.  She is having a spa party complete with a pink limo.   Seems reasonable.  But wait, first she is getting her gift: a new four wheeler!  With no training or helmets Gia and her little sister take off in the driveway.  Mommy is worried…that they might get dirty.    They pile into the limo and head to the spa while Mommy comments on how unaware her kids are about how much they spend on birthday parties.  Teresa is on a mission to convince us that she is a total moron.  Mission accomplished Teresa.  You can stop now.

It’s the night of the benefit.  The nice lady comes to Danielle’s home to plan their invasion.  Danny arrives in his best black t-shirt, fresh out of the Hanes package, and his hair is styled perfectly if he is Shawn Cassidy.  He is excited that in 6 days he will be off probation.  Tense music.  Tense edits.  Good work Bravo.

Caroline is chatting with Jacqueline and Teresa and tells us that she shaves her entire face every day.  I am not 100% sure why she does this and it brings strange images to mind.  Have you ever seen those TLC shows with the people that have hair all over their faces?    The conversation switches to Danielle and the event she is attending at the Brownstone. Yawn.  With all this build up I hope it’s exciting.

Finally, it’s time for the event. Danielle, Probation Danny, and the nice lady are on their way.   Danielle is excited that she is going to have an entourage waiting for her. Danny had the head of the Hell’s angels and some ex-cons meet them so they could walk in together.  Apparently she wants to slip in unnoticed.   Danielle goes out of her way to shake Chris’s hand.  She tells us it was a psychological ‘F you’ which is bizarre.  He is a KID and has nothing to do with this drama.  She says “I’m walking in the door at YOUR second home, YOUR BUSINESS.”    Who is she talking to?   She is creepy.  The nice lady makes a point of greeting Caroline’s son and he tells her that she is in for a surprise.  He tells us in his personal interview that he is referring to the fact that the event is being run by a hunters groups and they were in effect over dressed.    Nutty  Danielle did not miss the opportunity to twist that around and tell us that he was “sadistic” and that “you knew whose son that was.”    She is so…..odd.

Danielle greets the family of the sick baby and says she brought a lot of people.  Their child is facing a possibly fatal illness and they want to hear about her drama?    The Drama is only starting.   There is no table set up for Danielle.  She showed up with an entourage of guests that did not pay.  “Is this the big surprise Chris was referring to?”     She is such an idiot.  The venue is scrambling to set up a table for the self-proclaimed guest of honor and her goons.  She doesn’t like where the table is placed.  She is still complaining.   Danny is freaking out and yelling at people for not making things happen.  Danielle now feels the need to tell the family of the sick child that  “they don’t want me here” and continues to display her crazy for all the world to see.   Danielle tells whoever will listen that she is leaving with dignity.  The nice lady gave the family a check.  In the foyer Probation Danny is forgetting himself and getting angry.  Danielle is smirking and warning everyone how dangerous her entourage is.  All of them are surprised that a group of convicts, a Hell’s Angel, a prostitute whore, and one nice lady were not accepted with open arms and treated as royalty.   Even the tension filled music doesn’t make any of it add up to me.  Danny seems to find himself to be a very threatening person.  It’s kind of cute….like how a tiny dog barks and thinks he is very scary.

Danielle tells us that she has a good grasp on reality.  I am not going to touch that statement.  It’s a stand alone piece that demonstrates her lunacy.  She is ranting and raving about how the Manzo’s treated her badly.  She doesn’t understand that none of the Manzo’s had anything to do with the event.  Never mind.  Her voices in her head are too loud for the real world to get a word in.  Wow.

Gary Coleman, Dead at 42

Gary Coleman wanted to be known as more than the dude that said, “whatchu talkkn’ bout, Willis” but that character was etched into his life and psyche until the very end. How many of us have heard the theme to “Different Strokes” today?

The Administrator at 15MinutesGosselinStyle wrote a wonderful post that explains some of the details of Gary’s lawsuit against  his parents and the subsequent lawsuits that continued for years.

We all knew Gary was troubled. He recently married and admitted that he was still a virgin on his wedding night in his mid to late 30s. He had public battles with fans and even had a seazure on film, on the set of “the Insider” a few weeks ago. Luckily the esteemed and non-media-whore, Dr Drew was nearby (sarcasm).

Yesterday was Todd Bridges’ birthday. He played Willis. After the show ended he was arrested for various crimes and served time in jail. He’ll be on all the talk shows to discuss Gary. Anything for a buck.

Dana Plato was Kimberly on “Different Strokes.” She got pregnant but her character was a teenager so, I believe, she was fired from the show. She was arrested for robbing a dry cleaner (I think) and was eventually found dead in her trailer. Her young son recently committed suicide.

Brittney Murphy has been working since she was a child. I’ll admit, I LOVED her. I remember her on so many sitcoms and I adore the movie Uptown Girl. Her husband just killed himself.

“Boner” from Growing Pains killed himself earlier this year. Heath Ledger, Corey Haim, Michael Jackson.

Fame, infamy, and being in the public-eye has many casualties. This isn’t anything new. Judy Garland was also a child star and so was Anissa Jones (Buffy on “A Family Affair”).

When is enough ENOUGH?

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Real Housewives of NYC recap and spoilers

Last week’s installment was nuts.  We were left with promises that this week would be even crazier.  They lied.

We start out this week learning that Kelly has gone home.  WHEW.   It’s the morning after and everyone looks like they have been through a lot.  Hair is still crazy.  Bethenny grabbed a giant pink hat to wear to the breakfast table.  Seems reasonable. They decide that the four of them all get along and it should be peaceful for the rest of the trip.  Giggle.  Did they think Bravo would let them off the hook like that?

Ramona, Bethenny, Sonja, and Alex all enjoy some manicures and pedicures.  I am again so jealous of them all.  It looks like the perfect vacation.  Sunny skies, slight breeze, very nice.  What could go wrong?

SERRRP- Priiiiiiize!   It’s JILL here to SURPRISE them all.  Obviously Bravo was behind this since Jill would have not know how to fly into St. Thomas, take the ferry to St. John, and find the palace.   Getting to St. John is not an easy stop over, it took effort.  It took cooperation from Bravo.  Great set up.

Everyone looks shocked or angry or both.  Bobby is with Jill and they both seem to think there ought to be a happy reception.  What is up with Bobby?  Is he completely unaware of his wife and the drama surrounding her?

Jill tells us in her private interview that they did not seem happy to see her.  Great powers of observation.

Ramona tries to be honest and civil with her.  She explains that there has a lot of drama.  Jill tells us that she saw Kelly in the airport.  Jill is honestly planning to pretend that she has not been talking to Kelly the whole time???

Alex is shook up.  She is not herself. I think she misses the strength of Simon being by her side.  I really think they are soul mates and need each other.  She looks like a child who is lost in the shopping mall.  She needs her man.

Ramona tries to talk to Jill…who is completely unwilling to see that this was not a good surprise.  Ramona tries really hard and apologizes a number of times.  Bobby has a small conversation with Bethenny and it’s super uncomfortable to witness that.

Jill sobs to Bobby that they are not nice.  I feel slightly sorry for her.  She is delusional.  She thought she could talk to Bethenny there?  Why not talk in NYC where you live a block apart?  Why did you respond so horribly when Bethenny called you?

Finally the remaining guests are settled in for dinner and their hair looks better than it has it has in days.  Sorry, I notice this stuff.  Oh wait…a few scenes in and Alex’s hair is frizzing.  Sorry.

Ramona chokes.  Sonja wants to give her the Heimlich maneuver whether she needs it or not.   The talk turns to penis size.  Ummm…ok then.  “It’s not the size of the boat but the motion of the ocean” is Alex’s only comment. Sonja thinks that large ears mean a large penis. Bethenny tells us that she doesn’t want “dumbo with a large package.”

Alex announces that they are having a bridal shower for both Ramona and Bethenny.   By bridal shower they mean sex fetish devices.  Ramona seems out of her element with the kink factor.  Sonja wonders how that is possible since ramona claims to happy after years of marriage.  I guess you can’t have a happy marriage unless there is bondage?  How long has Sonja been married?  Oh, that’s right….she’s divorced.  Maybe she is not the one to be handing our marriage advice?

For some reason they made wedding dresses out of toilet paper.  This must be a tradition that I never heard of.   I wonder if it was quilted?

Luann, Jill and Jen the party planner meet for lunch.  Luann understands why Ramona threw Jill off the island.   Kelly shows up.  She is looking strange. Kelly tells us that she was shell-shocked after she left the island.  Kelly is there to tell them that she hated how they talked badly about people and gossiped about people….kind of like she was doing now.  She goes on to explain that she called Bethenny a “ho bag” and assured them that this is an accurate description of her.  She goes on to attack the notion that Bethenny is a “cook” and says that she has never heard of her catering any parties for the people she knows.  Each person at the table refuted this claim and she simply kept talking.

Her most shocking statement was to say that Bethenny admitted attacking her the press and she claimed that Bethenny said “I went out of my way to have a smear campaign against you.”     KELLY- do you understand that this stuff is all filmed?  Do you get that you are being proven a liar right now?   Then she starts talking about her jelly beans.  She tells us that she “had to go back in there to police them.”  and Jill wonders if she was worried that they would get her jelly beans.    That was a funny comment Jill.  Wait till you see the finished episode; you will see how funny you comment really was.

Jill and Luann agreed that they were confused by this account of the weekend.  Jen assures us that the truth is somewhere in the middle.

The housewives are now at a party.  Alex begins to explain to Luann that she was surprised Kelly would say that anyone was mean to her.  They all decide to go upstairs and talk it out.  This is important, I guess.  We need to hear Bethenny tell Luann what happened last week in St. John.   We all saw it happen.  Nothing she says even comes close to giving it justice.  You can’t explain the crazy because no one would believe it.  She should have told her “just wait for the episode.”

Luann shows her children the penthouse at the Thompson Hotel.  I don’t know why we needed to see that.  Did Thompson Hotel need a plug?

It’s now time for Jill’s holiday party.  Jen is there.  She is asking Jill is she wants to do a speech and what time does she want people to skate…..ok….I am an event planner.  That conversation doesn’t happen as the event begins.  It happens a weeks before, in the planning.  Is Jen being paid for this?

Suddenly Jill is missing Bethenny.  She wants to make up.  She calls her and asks her to lunch.  It’s one of the few conversations that did not happen on speaker phone.  She agreed to meet her and we are all hopeful for this meeting.  Who doesn’t like peace?

Jill came to her party all decked out in a skating outfit. She is planning to do a little performance.

Cutaway to Kelly saying that she has never heard Jill talk about anything sporty her life and she makes a funny face about the skating outfit.  Does any of this fall under her “no gossip, no bad talk” rule?

Jill comes on to say that a lot of people don’t know that she used to be a skater….when she was NINE…so that explains why she is now in this outfit.  She is about to put on a performance.  Luanne is being fancy in her rented skates.   Jill immediately fell on the ice.    How long has it been since she was NINE?    She begins to skate in circles and spin around  followed by skating backwards.   She then poses for pictures.  I rewound the DVR a few times because I thought I missed the performance.  Maybe it was edited out??

Ramona arrives and is immediately attacked by Kelly who seems to be unaware of what actually happened in St. John.  Kelly feels Ramona did not defend her and have her back.  She begins to say things that make no sense.  She is certain that she doesn’t need any help.  That makes one of us.  Ramona eventually gets control and is able to say that she is sorry Kelly is upset.  That appears to calm her.  Can you imagine what her ex-husband went through with this nut job?

Jill tells us that she just wants peace and harmony.  She wants to start over.  She works really hard to listen to Ramona when she talks.  I give her some credit for that.  They hug and assure each other that things are ok.

All in all, this was mostly an overhyped episode that basically rehashed last weeks drama.  I think I am relieved.

They work hard for their mommy . . . so hard for their mommy . . .

Real Housewives of New Jersey: Teresa gives birth, Recap and Spoilers

Teresa’s in labor.  She is packing:

• Make up
• Jewelry
• Designer pajamas
• Burberry tote bag
• Bored husband

You know, all the needed things. She is her classy self with her hair all fluffed and her face made up, while she tells her sister that she has diarrhea.  Classy.   Her going to the hospital wardrobe consists of platform heels, tight jeans and a strapless blouse.   This is all so quaint….and bizarre.

After checking her email and dragging her husband out of the house she arrives at the hospital.  In the waiting room her dumpy hubby jokes about having more children.  Funny stuff.

Caroline’s son,  Christopher, wants to own a car wash/strip club.  I don’t see how these two things go together.  The adults entertain his stupidity and pretend to take it seriously.  I am tired of hearing about it.  Mom and Dad will “invest” in his stupid idea and keep it running for a while.  We all know that his future involves working at the Brownstone but we play along and pretend there are other options.

Danielle is eating out with her daughters.  They are discussing Christine’s modeling career and how it might be disappointing.  (Flashback to her puking on the runway)  Christine stumbles over her line about the industry.  Danielle seems like she have been informed that her daughter is not going to Paris and she won’t be getting the coat tail ride she hoped for.    Both daughters struggled for the right thing to say.  Mommy doesn’t look happy but she appears to have accepted that her daughter’s are not going to pull their weight.  Damn it.  She says something corny about family but it doesn’t match her expression.

Back at the hospital we see Teresa taking multiple phone calls.  At one point she says she is 3 centimeters dilated.   Why is she there?   I am experienced at giving birth;  at 3 cm I would be home watching TV or shopping in the mall.    Did we need to know that she shaved her “chucky”?    After a graphic shot of her getting an epidural, we are finally released……whew

Ashley is talking to her mom.  They appear to be very uncomfortable in their conversation.  I am sure the cameras are helping the strained relationship.   Mom wants Ashley to see a life coach.  The idea is not catching on.   Ashley is trying to say the right things.  She wants to go to community college.  Mom wants to know FOR WHAT?   Then she makes some condescending comment in her interview about how Ashley doesn’t have it all figured out.   What is wrong with this woman?  NO 18 year old has it figured out.  You tell them to go to college and get general credits while they are working on figuring it out.  I wonder if Jacqueline has a degree?

Now we are treated to a ridiculous and unnecessary strip club scene.  Supposedly Christopher is doing “research” to determine if he wants to own a strip club.    Chris is ogling the nekkid wimmins while his voice over is telling us that he has his mind on more important things.  Ok then….

Back at the hospital we are treated to more of Teresa screaming and grunting and seeming surprised that it hurts.  Her fourth child and she is still surprised.  Thankfully we are only tortured with the sound and we don’t have to witness it.

Our first view is Teresa holding the swaddled baby.  The child is minutes old and her mommy asked if she can “put, like, fru fru things on her?”…..wow.  She is HARD CORE with this girly stuff.   Hours of labor and  THIS is what is her on her mind?  I give her credit.  After giving birth I just wanted to sleep.

Not my favorite father but he's just so "juicy!' Hey, maybe that's why Teresa keeps getting knocked up. Juicy, more like greasy.

Teresa: What should we name her?

Joe: I don’t care.

That is recorded for history.  Nice work Joe.

Jacqueline and her hubby are having a drink.  She shares her idea about the life coach meeting with Ashley.  He laughs.  He thinks she needs a beating.  Dina pops in to say that she thinks she needs a wooden spoon.  It seems that these kids were all beaten.   A LOT.  It’s all starting to make sense now.

Chris opens his safe to show his wife what he has in there.  GUNS.  She freaks for a half second and then begins playing with them.  I think we hit on a weird side to her personality.

Danielle meets with her friend Kathy.  Yes, she has a friend….or that is what the script says.  We are now told that Christine is going to model in wedding shows.  “Designer gowns” is what Danielle says.   “The pay is good too.”   Great, the modeling career is back on track. Snicker.   (I work in wedding shows.  ALL the gowns are “designer’ and the models get about $50 to $75 per show)   Back to the show:  For some reason we are now being told about a sick baby with cancer.   Kathy says they are having a fundraiser to help with the expenses.   They want Danielle to attend.  I will go out on a ledge and guess that they are going with the Coney Island Freak Show theme for this fundraiser?

The men arrive to tell Danielle about the fundraiser.  She starts the conversation by saying “Tell me what happened and then I want to hear how this came to be.”    Yes, Danielle demands to know how this child got cancer.   Interesting question.  I will have to remember that next time I hear about someone with a terrible diagnoses:  TELL ME WHAT HAPPENED.  How did you get CANCER?  TELL ME!!

The benefit is at the BROWNSTONE.  Seems these two men are the only people on the East coast that don’t know Caroline hates Danielle?   Do they WATCH the show?   Nooo…this couldn’t be a set up situation hoping to create tension and drama and completely scripted by Bravo???….Noooo….this is REALITY Tv.

Dina called a meeting with Caroline and Jacqueline.  This is the first time she has left her house all season?   Caroline tells us that a meeting is serious.    Topic:  DANIELLE!!    Of course.  Dina wants to sit down with Danielle and tell her that she wants nothing to do with her.   Some of us would just stop hanging out but Dina wants a big moment.  Caroline thinks it’s a bad idea.  Jacqueline thinks it’s a bad idea…..while she calls out all Danielle’s alias’…..tension…drama

Chris is going to run a car wash for the day.  He brings in several girls in skimpy clothes.  They begin to wave in cars and…at least for the camera….it’s working.  The owner returns to say that it’s great.  Caroline says no man on the planet thinks it’s a bad idea.   Once more butt close up and thankfully, scene over.

Danielle is visiting two friends.   Danny says they have a kindred spirit.  Maybe it’s because they both have brown hair…and faces that look like they have partied a LOT…..and his hair is bad. They begin bashing the Manzo’s. Danny is going to escort her to the Brownstone.  For some reason she feels better taking this rat with her.  I don’t get it.

Dina visits with Teresa, in her leopard print, and the new baby, in her giant flower hat.  Dina gushes about the baby.   Teresa tells her that she is the Godmother.   They both cry.  It’s very sweet.  You know they are not acting because neither of them CAN act.  It was a touching scene.

We are treated to a rare moment when Caroline’s husband is at home.  He came to tell her that Danielle is coming to a fundraiser at the Brownstone.  Caroline is mad.  She is ready to deal with her.

Bravo has done an excellent job with the set up.  The music gets intense.  Flash to a few scenes from next week.   It gets  weird here.  We KNOW we are being set up…but I still want to know what will happen next week.  And I will tune in.

“Breaking Bad” Season 3, Episode 10, “FLY” — recap and spoilers

No original recap this week. Please check out Allen’s recaps at HitFlix

What Allen’s Watching

Allen’s watching BREAKING BAD.