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RHNJ: Season 2, Episode 1

Danielle goes to a priest to tell him how awful the other ladies are and requests he teach her how to pray for them. It was an excuse for her to say “they looked up my past and called me names in front of my daughter.” Um, Danielle, YOU brought the book to the dinner (last season’s finale). You also could have sent your daughters out of the room, as the other ladies did, but you chose to let your very mature daughters watch you make a complete ass of yourself.

From the seasons future clips, it seems this season will be all about everybody against Danielle. I guess I should feel sorry for her for allowing Bravo to portray her as such an ignorant psychopath, but she’s over 21, signed the papers and is obviously capable of making her own decisions.

Teresa and her family members are making their yearly batch of Italian tomato sauce. It was a very nice scene except for one part. Somehow, they were discussing Jewish men and one of the young daughters said, “I don’t want to marry a Jewish man . .. they make their kids wear . . .” “OH, don’t say that . . .” ha ha, laugh it off, isn’t the kid cute.

Ok, Bravo. What was the point of that scene? So Jewish people like me will wonder what this little girl hears in her household to make her think negatively about Jewish people or why the editors decided to keep that obvious controversial line in the show. Also, knowing how much I trust reality TV I have to wonder if that line was scripted for the little girl or if this young child already has a prejudice for a certain group of people that are “different.” I’m sure this won’t be the last we hear about this subject.

What I liked about the sauce making is the few things I learned.

  1. You put a potato in the pot and when the potato is cooked, the sauce is done.
  2. The make it a family event with all the generations participating and the younger children learning. I found this to be very sweet and made me crave a little Italian in my life (or a big Italian, but I digress)
  3. They make enough sauce for a year. I think they said they jarred over 100 bottles. That’s really cool and probably extremely economical.
  4. Italians have a superstition that if a woman is “on her time” that she shouldn’t be involved in the cooking of the sauce. Somehow, if a woman has her period, she will ruin the entire batch of tomato sauce. Okay. I wonder if Italian men cook for one week a month . . . .

Jacqueline, my favorite on this show, tells her husband that she won’t close the door on Danielle. I’m not sure why but she says she might still want to text her. Whatever. Her husband has decided that he doesn’t wan the woman in his life, in J’s life or in his house. He doesn’t want the drama in his life. Gee, maybe he should have thought about that before his sisters and wife signed up for a REALITY SHOW!

Caroline’s husband has lost a great deal of weight and they go shopping for his new wardrobe. Very sweet. Caroline cries when she sees how great her man looks.

Caroline is having her yearly $!000 plate fund raiser for the Sheriff. They support their local law enforcement. Her husband instructs the boys (young men) to clean up all the dog poop before the real workers come to turn their backyard into a party paradise. Dad says, “Get Vito to help you.” Vito, it seems was Albie’s best friend for the past 5 years and now he’s dating Albie’s sister. He can’t handle it. Vito and the sister are happy in love, “he lives to make me happy” and they seem sincere and authentic. Vito shows up to clean poop in a suit. Scenes of nicely dressed men cleaning poop and scenes of dogs pooping. Riveting TV.

Danielle goes to the salon and has to mention that when she first started going there, Dina worked there. Is this a bad thing that Dina had a job? I ‘thought’ Dina and Danielle were friends but Danielle just needed to get a dig in at Dina. During her pedicure (ugly feet), Danielle was informed that Caroline is having a huge fund raiser. Danielle wonders why she wasn’t invited and is really ticked off. Maybe she should ask the Bravo scene writer why she wasn’t invited. The other shows always have people who hate each other having dinner and being social. I know that when people who hate me don’t include me in their social life, the first thing I do is feel slighted . . . eye roll . . .

Danielle, the psycho, puts her girls in the car and is going over to check out the party that she wasn’t invited to. Her daughter is more mature than she is and Danielle is showing CPS that she is mentally damaged and should not be raising daughters. Seriously, How safe is it to bring your children on your outings when you are angry and full of rage? She thinks this party is against her. She’s nuts.

Jacqueline says it sounds like a high-school lunch table when the ladies trash Danielle. Everybody was trashing her and Jacqueline and Dina were getting angry hearing their friend being gossiped about.

Danielle is repeating over and over “I don’t care that I wasn’t invited . . .” yeah, we can tell by the bulging eyes, hands grasping the steering wheel and the petrified look on your little girls’ faces that you don’t care you fucking psychopath.

Danielle wonders why they need to charge a plate if they are “thick as thieves” with the Sheriff. Danielle has the passive-aggressive sarcasm down pat and if I wasn’t disliking her so much, I’d almost be envious of her guts. ALMOST. She’s really kind of creepy.

Danielle’s girls don’t want to make a jerk of herself. They are smart girls but Danielle is saying “I couldn’t care less that I’m NOT invited . . .” Wow. Danielle listened and went home. She claims she wouldn’t give them the satisfaction of showing she cares? What, don’t you think that they will see you driving and practliay foaming at the mouth because you weren’t invited to a party you can’t afford?l She went home with her daughters. Maybe one of them will be named her legal guardian and she could have mommy committed to a loony bin.

In other stories, Jacqueline’s 18 year old daughter moved in with a “friend.” and comes over with her 24 year old boyfriend and his puny dog. Jacqueline is concerned that her daughter is young and stupid, and she has a good reason for this since her daughter doesn’t even know how to open a checking account and her “diploma” is probably a GED. She says she needs “a semester off” and Jacqueline’s husband (is he her dad?) says, “a week off of WHAT?” Then they have the scripted scene of the protective father chopping vegetables with a big, sharp knife while the older boyfriend swallows deeply and fears for his testicles. Subtle Bravo.

Extremely uncomfortable and unnessess scene with Jacqueline asking her daughter and boyfriend if they are safe and do they use h control. The girl can’t write a check, you think she’d know how to . . . oh never mind. We know she will be pregnant by the end of the season (not really, just assuming).

In another story, there is this blond lady that owns a store. Danielle comes in and does her usual whine and gripe about the other ladies and the woman and Danielle shook hands and committed to their alliance of true friendship.

At Caroline’s party, that same woman and her boyfriend, who’s not a wise guy but could play one in any movie, come and sit at the table with the housewives. This woman proceeds to trash Danielle as Bravo cuts to scenes of her and Danielle declaring friendship. Kudos to the editor. This blond lady is obviously a two-faced housewife reject who wants her 15 minutes and will do what it takes to get “noticed.”

Coming attractions show more Danielle fights, Jacqueline and Dina turning against her, Caroline giving long speeches, yelling, confrontations and a gun. Yes, you can’t have a New Jersey storyline without a gun. Something had to top the table turn, right?

May 5, 2010 Posted by | Real Housewives of New Jersey, Reality TV, RHNJ | | Comments Off on RHNJ: Season 2, Episode 1