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Do you watch the Oscars? UPDATED with my favorite TWEETS

Do you watch the Oscars?

Have you seen any of the nominated movies?

I saw UP and CORALINE. I loved UP and would be thrilled if it actually won for best picture (not a chance) but CORALINE, nominated for Animated Feature Film and was one of the most disturbing pictures I’ve ever seen in my life. I hated it and wanted to walk out but I was with 3 other people.

For some reason, my ABC has no sound in my bedroom so I am unable to watch the Oscars. Yes, I can go kick my kid off of the Wii but I don’t want to watch the Oscars THAT BAD so I will just post some funny tweets as the show goes on.

radioguychris OMG! I love Gabourey Sidibe more and more every time I see her. “If fashion were porn, this dress would be the money shot.” HA!

radioguychris DAMN! Miley Cyrus has no business being anywhere near Hollywood & Highland tonight.

BorowitzReport Miley Cyrus looks like she stepped right out of a MySpace profile

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PFTompkins I love Jon Cryer always.

radioguychris DUCKIE!!!!

NerdGirlBlogger Sweet, look at the old 80s stars!

radioguychris WOW. Loved that tribute to John Hughes.

MoRocca When are Ed Asner and Ernest Borgnine going to make a buddy flick?

slackmistress I think Robert Downey Jr shaved so that Judd Nelson couldn’t knock him out and steal his life. #oscarss

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PFTompkins Congratulations to Meshach Taylor and Kaye Ballard.

MoRocca That acceptance speech was apartheid all over again!

DougBensonDid white lady just interrupt black dude? And did he interrupt her back? And the orchestra interrupt both of them? What. The. #oscars

MoRoccaThat lady is the Oscars’ Kanye: Imma gonna let you finish but Beyonce had the best documentary short!

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Lizzs_Lockeroom #sotrue #Congrats! “Sometimes you have to forgo what’s popular, to do what’s right.” – Mo’Nique #oscars

DougBenson Wait, politics almost kept Mo’Nique from winning an Oscar? #huh

MMFlint What Monique meant by acad recog perform & not politics is that she refused to do all the silly oscar campaigning they want u to do & won!

CelebStoner Who should stoners root for to win #Oscars? Well, Woody Harrelson already lost, but we’ve still got Jeff Bridges & longshot ‘A Serious Man’

DougBenson There is no truth to the rumor that Keanu Reeves has crop circles in his beard. #oscars

DougBenson Take your time getting to the stage, costume lady, we can’t wait to hear about how you won twice before. Also, nice outfit! #oscars

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DougBenson My tits? Oh, they’re here and here. -Charlize Theron

NerdGirlBlogger Loving Charlize’s tit dress. If I wasn’t wearing my pj’s, I’d be able to rip on it a little bit more.

@NancyLeeGrahn: I didnt hear a word charlize said. I couldt stop looking at the cinnabuns attached to her boobs

@JesusNeedsNewPR: Looks like Charlize Theron bought fake flowers at Michaels to cover the places where her boobs are supposed be located. #Oscars

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PFTompkins So glad Riff Raff is finally winning an Oscar.

DougBenson That guy who just won gave a short speech because he has to go try to kill Bruce Willis now. He also played the doctor in FUNNY PEOPLE.

DougBenson Oh, shit, the DIE HARD villain won again. You’re safe for now, McClane! #oscars

@ew: Woody Harrelson just joked that his best acting was when Penelope Cruz announced Christoph Waltz as best supporting actor.

@deporitaz: Take a shot everytime Kristen Stewart bites her lip

NerdGirlBlogger I am so sick of Kristen Stewart’s sour puss.

@taylahburrows: Kristen Stewart actually looked like a girl, but she looked incredibly awkward walking in heels. Taylor Lautner looked awesome as usual.

Dominic_Addams Kristin Stewart what the hell is she doing she looks like she doesn’t want to be there!! If you don’t like to be famous get a real job!!!

@maceo87 Kristen Stewart could have cleared that resin out of her lungs backstage, no?

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radioguychris Sandra Bullock needs to fire her makeup artist.

MoRocca Sandra Bullock looks like a vampire

@DCdebbie: Forget Miss Confidentiality, Sandra Bullock was in Speed! True talent is not laughing playing alongside Keanu. #Oscars

MoRocca Demi Moore is doing the dead people montage?!?! Because she’ll look the same when she’s 120?

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NerdGirlBlogger Must there be interpretive dancing?

PFTompkins I love the J. Crew Dancers!

MoRocca Loving the Hurt Locker voguing!

bazecraze Ladies and Gentlemen, the Bathroom Break dancers!

DougBenson The Academy was forced to hire all these dancers as part of Obama’s jobs bill. #oscars

scottknaster This dancing to movie scores thing is horrible. #oscars

jodywatley i think george clooney had a few drinks before #Oscars 🙂

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MMFlint Editors for Hurt Locker: “We did this with no focus groups or studio notes.” Imagine that, filmmakers allowed to make their own movie!

billmaher The only reason this fucking show is 9 hours long is so they can sell more commercials

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MoRocca I like Jeff Bridges but he looks like he smells.

NerdGirlBlogger Is it me, or does it appear that Jeff Bridges beard stinks to high hell?

MoRocca And the winner for best Best Actor endorsement speech is Tim Robbins!

PFTompkins Now, who’s the older Bridges brother– Jeff or Todd?

MLBastian Listening to Jeff Bridges‘ speech, I am realizing he wasn’t really acting when he played The Dude. That was just him. Awesome.

MsInformation Bridges was rambling but I really don’t care because he’s Jeff Bridges, for crying out loud. Totally endearing. #oscars

MoRocca Oprah’s going to give EVERYONE an Oscar!!

helloross So glad Oprah looks pretty!!!

1600doctorb I think Oprah just endorsed skipping school.

NerdGirlBlogger F U Oprah!

PFTompkins Hey, everybody! MR. FUN IS HERE!!!!

DougBenson I’m sure what Sean Penn just said made sense to someone, somewhere. #oscars

NerdGirlBlogger I really thought Gabourey Sidibe was going to win it. So ready to puke right now.

billmaher Actors are just the bestest people in thw world! We are so lucky to be sharing the earth with them!! Fuck!!!

March 6, 2010 Posted by | Movies | Comments Off on Do you watch the Oscars? UPDATED with my favorite TWEETS

Chelsea Handler and Ted Halbert Break up! Ted taking it hard . . .

Host of Chelsea Lately Chelsea Handler broke up with her partner and boss Ted Harbert after three years. The 34-year-old talk show host kicked Harbert out of their Los Angeles home leaving him to stay at a hotel in Hollywood.

Harbert is the CEO of the Comcast Entertainment Group and oversees E! Entertainment Television, which features Handler‘s late-night talk show. One can only speculate about what this means for Chelsea‘s career and work relations with her ex.

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Breaking up is hard to do, especially when you’re Chelsea Handler and Ted Harbert.

And it’s not just because the president and CEO of the Comcast Entertainment Group is technically Handler’s boss over at E! – the talk-show queen must be regretting that her upcoming book “Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang,” which she wrote when they were together, centers on her ex-man.

Which means that Halbert, who may not have aired his grievances as publicly, may have to relive the break up when the tome hits bookstores on March 9.

The funnygirl’s memoir goes as far as to hint that she and Harbert would be together forever.

“I said, p-promise you’ll n-n-never do anything that will make me break up with you,” Chelsea writes of a talk she had with Harbert after she watched the “Sex and the City” movie.

Ted responded: “I would never do that to you. You’ll probably do it to me, but I would never do it to you.”

But there were certainly some early warning signs that Splitsville was just down the road for the power couple.In one chapter of Chelsea’s book, she details her initial struggles over first shacking up with Harbert.

She writes: “My boyfriend is similar to a large toddler … He’s very animated and has a lot of energy and wants to exert it all at the same time on a variety of activities. It’s not a secret this can be incredibly annoying.”

March 6, 2010 Posted by | Chelsea Handler, Couples, Gossip | | 4 Comments

TVSnark Blog is One Year Old

My first post was on March 6th 2009.

Since JupiterJen is also making posts, I’ve decided to give myself an actual name. I’ll now be “Kippie,” which is the name I’ve been using over at Z’s for a few months. I’m not being a sock-puppet or trying to ‘change my identity’ – –  I just want more of a name. TVSnark is my blog . . .  Kippie is my name.

Hope I didn’t confuse anybody.

March 6, 2010 Posted by | Reality TV | | Comments Off on TVSnark Blog is One Year Old

“Celebrity Rehab 3” Graduation Recap

Three weeks sober. Yippee freaking doo da. They all get up to speak and say, “this place is amazing, I love you all dearly, . . ” bla bla bla and then the other patients get to give “feedback” on that person. Much of this feedback was left on the cutting room floor.

Mike Starr, from Alice in Chains, seems very sincere in his attempt to stay sober. His band member died of a drug overdose and that seems to have had a huge effect on him. I never listened to AIC and couldn’t name one of their songs if my life depended on it.

Heidi realizes she needs people in her life. All she has is her birds and those birds have become the most important things in her life, well, except methamphetamine, of course She said she’ll go months without her phone ringing. I don’t know why I like her but I think she’s not a bad person, just very wounded (and stupid). Her name is notorious and she will never be remembered for anything but being the Hollywood Madam for Charlie Sheen.

Joey, Joey, Joey. Yeah, he’s a future statistic. He claims he will NEVER do drugs around his future kid. Yeah. Mackenzie warned him about his temper. Yeah, that temper is an issue, Joey-boy.

MacKenzie Phillips is inspirational and amazing. Kari Ann told her that she has nothing nice to say because Mac, “let her down” so she wishes her “good luck.” Dr. Drew told Mac she’s a great friend and really cares about people. That’s what I felt about her too.

Tom Sizemore is a mess. When Heidi had to speak at Graduation she slammed him. First she said that (paraphrasing)–looking at him makes her feel better about herself because he’s such a loser and any woman would be gay rather than be with him.–

Her intense hatred of Tom is clear and I think it’s unprofessional to have them in the same facility. Are they going to be living in Sober House together?  No professional center would have former lovers with such a violent and dysfunction history in the same facility. IT JUST ISN’T DONE and I wonder if this isn’t some kind of  false hatred to feign drama and emotions. Heidi seemed to sincerely despise the man and if she’s “acting” – – her future career should be in TV or movies.

Mindy said he could be a big star again and that he’s so handsome.

Dennis is telling him that HE WAS IN HOLLYWOOD. bfd.

Dr. Drew telling Tom he’s going to die and his kids will be touching his gravestone.

Bob gave great words of support and told Tom that after 13 years sober people feel about him the way that Heidi feels about Tom.

Lisa, whoever she is, talks about the wonderful experience but she’s denying any addiction. She thinks it was a “preventative” measure to go to rehab and stated that she hopes she never gets “as bad” as the other patients. Ok. I guess she was there for a career advancement but since I still have no idea who she is, it really didn’t work, did it?

Dennis. Ego. Arrogant. And no way in hell will he say he won’t drink again. It’s his life. Cocaine is his “drug of choice” and I think he’s doomed.

Mindy. Seisure, dislocated shoulder, hair to the side but she remembered Dennis saying “we here for you baby,” when she was in the ambulance. Big heart. She loves him to death.

Dr. Drew. “You are a biological, organic expression of American History . . . ” Oh shut the fuck up Dr. Drew.

Will you go to Sober Living?

KerriAnn says she’ll go to Sober Living. Of course she will, it’s another show.

Mike doesn’t want to go to Sober Living but he will follow Drew’s direction.

Heidi can’t be away from her birds and she’s “cured” but she’ll go.

Mindy “would love to finish the journey” but she has a 3 year old and she has to be with her little boy. She plans on-going care. Good luck.

Joey, Oh, JOEY. “Loved the program, great, I am going to Sober Living . . .  just not right now. Need to be with GF and help her move. I’ll go to a meeting, get a sponsor and work the steps.” Sure you will.

Mackenzie has a stable home, strong support system but she made the choice not to go to Sober living. I think she’ll be better off NOT in another Dr. Drew experiment. She has friends who are clean and sober and I don’t think living with little bitches like Kari Ann is good for anybody’s sobriety.

Tom wants to go home. He wants to go home but he’s not going to. He’s going to Sober Living. Heidi rolls her eyes. I thought he was homeless. What about his wonderful girlfriend?

Lisa, whoever she is, says she’s going to live soberly and go to meetings on her own. Since she’s not an addict . . . she doesn’t have anything to worry about except people knowing who the fuck she is.

Dennis. “I got things I gotta do man.” Hemming, hawing, excuses, kids . . . babbling, they even put captions since he’s hard to understand. “yeah, I guess I’m going to Sober house.”

or  . . . Yes, I’ll do another TV show.

March 6, 2010 Posted by | Celebrity Rehab | Comments Off on “Celebrity Rehab 3” Graduation Recap